11/23

Today is my birthday! 

I love birthdays, laughing, games, gatherings, cake; everything associated with birthdays.

I have always celebrated my birthday as if it were my last or a national holiday.

If you knew me when, you'd truly understand...

This year was different than any other:

-I stayed up til just before midnight to pray my birthday in.

-I woke up to wonderful texts from framily.

-I went to work (I usually take my birthday off no matter what).

-I was joyful and giddy.

-I'm on my couch with my dog and I'm in sweats. 

-I will be up praying at midnight tonight.

To the average person, my celebration would be labeled BASIC.

*shrugs*

I didn't do anything out of the norm, nor anything "memorable", but it's been amazing.

It may not seem glamorous, but it is special to me.

Simply knowing that I am redeemed, loved, respected, and wanted is EVERYTHING!

Hello, my name is Corie and I am basic.

I was born on 11/23.

I am purposed to encourage, edify, and empower.

I. Am. Whole.

That is what's most important...

#BasicButBetter

#30Layers30Days

You're Worth It

Journal Entry: November 5

I woke up late, I woke up tired...

*PERISCOPE NOTIFICATION*

I tuned in, by invitation, to a random guy, worshiping to start his day…

Worship is infectious. I began to worship. I did so the entire morning while getting ready for work. My worship entered into my prayer with my kids. Though I do not remember my prayer verbatim, it included:

*thanking God for the hedge of protection around my family.

*thanking Him for making our paths easy and straight today.

*thanking Him for grace, mercy, and favor.

By the time, I reached the end of my block, I heard “his financial blessing is coming”. I continued to give thanks. My heart was warm, filled with hope, and just grateful.

***turns on radio***

‘Worth Fighting For’, by Brian Courtney Wilson was on.

I absolutely love this song!!! The irony here is that I only know the hook:

Eyes haven't seen, ears haven't heard

All You have planned for me

I thought, “I'm worth fighting for"

Nothing can separate me from
Your love when there's so much
more still worth fighting for

God said, “If you truly believe that, why aren't you fighting for me. Am I not worth fighting for?” At this point, all I could do was cry – tears of revelation, hope, repentance, love.

*song plays, God speaks on* 

and nothing can separate me from

I thought back over the last couple of months. Many things, circumstances, people (self included), came too close to separating me from God, during this time period.

I was a stuck, feeling forsaken. I did everything I knew to do without any resolve, so I built walls (my defense mechanism). My focus was on everything but God.

Revelation: He had been fighting for me, though I couldn’t see it. He thought enough of me to keep me near, when I couldn’t fight for myself and wouldn’t fight for him.

Fear is paralyzing; it’ll make you a prisoner of the process*.

Regain focus. Be cautious of the things you give time and attention to.

Freedom comes with oppression (ridicule, condemnation, fear), obligation (God’s Way, friends, family), obstacles (work, racism, finance, temptation).

Suffer. Learn. Grow.

#RevelationInWorship

*"Prisoner of the Process" is lesson taught by Pastor Marcus Mobley of Armor of God Worship Center. Follow him on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, & Periscope

The Cycle Keeps Repeating

When you don't express it, 

not only my gift, but your gift suffers.

When you don't express it,

the madness silently creeps in 

When you don't express it,

the out-seeping madness doesn't blend

When you don't express it,

walls reappeared, re-climbing to discover

When you don't express it,

the cycle keeps repeating.

When you don't express it,

 what you say is fleeting

while what you whisper is defeating.

When you don't express it,

your gifts you fail to reclaim

You're attracted to this cycle,

like a moth to a flame.

#FunctionInYourPurpose

#30Layers30Days

Run or Reign

"I like writing flawed women, and being one, it's something I feel I can write with some veracity and authority." 

~Callie Khouri

Though I have never really written a character, I write for the flawed woman.
I am flawed.
I have learned to embrace my flaws. In sharing my flaws, I learned the power of testimony.
I also learned how to testify; shining light on my dark moments....

I didn't realize this until my friend, Cordelia, sent me this text:
"Love you more. Thank you for showing me how to be transparent. #NotOnMyWatch"

Her text showed me five things:
1. I no longer run, but reign over my flaws and the darkness.
2. Even I cannot remove jewels from the crown God gave me.
3. Those jewels are the light that removes power from the enemy's hand.
4. Like it or not, you are an example to someone.
5. You choose the impact you have on yourself and others.

With the many pressures of society, it can be difficult to remain true to oneself.
It isn't an easy feat to be your authentic self without risking ridicule, being shunned, or unaccepted.

Welcome to Corie's Corner!
This corner of the world wide web gives me a voice.
In this nook, I can be unapologetically ME.


#NoNegativityNovember

The Next Puzzle Piece...

"Denied not delayed"

pertaining to you, seems cliché

Denial feeds doubt

you're trapped, can't breakaway

 

Carefully piece it together;

denials meant to tether, slowly made you better

 

Consider the big picture,

See where it all fits.

His timing is perfect,

on the throne He sits.

 

Don't force it. When it's right, 

no need for elbow grease.

It'll snap into place,

your next puzzle piece.

 

Everything's finally in place,

your puzzle is complete.

Framed and mounted,

Gaze upon it as a treat

Not picture perfect,

none-the-less a masterpiece

purposed for this moment,

such an ending is bitter-sweet.

 

#YouAreThePiece

 

#30Layers30Days

What I See Now

Life's journey has varied obstacles.

I see the pressure I've always put on myself. 

I see why I quit.

I see the cycles this has caused.

I see that this has been difficult to admit.

I see who I am.

I see my becoming.

I see who I was.
This journey is stunning.

I see that I can...

#TestimonyTuesday

Cul de Sac

On Struggle Street - 

Here she sits -
Uncertain, Unaccepted, Unhinged.

Hear her thoughts -
Unclouded, Unbelieving, Unforgettable.

Crossing Courage Court - 

Hear her heart -
Unaltered, Unchained, Unattached.

Here she stands -
Unqualified, Unashamed, Undefeated.

At Redeemed Road -

Meet your new neighbor, Unapologetic.

She has arrived...at a cul de sac.

Where does she go from here? 

#ForkInTheRoad

#30Layers30Days

His Touch...

His touch,

is never selfish, never cold.

...oh so calming.

His touch,

reminds me that I am desired.

...oh so soothing.

His touch -

tells me how he's feeling.

...oh so loving.

His touch is his love language. 

It's playful, never violent.

It's sensual, never rough.

...oh so needed.

I know it anywhere.

EXCEPT TARGET!!!

His touch was unlike any other...

As I leaned over looking at "unmentionables",

my butt cheek was met with one unsuspecting, swift, hard smack.

IT SOUNDED OFF! It startled me and angered me.

I dropped my purse, turned around with jaw dropped, and fists raised.

You know, the square off stance LOL.

I'm thinking "I'm bout hurt whatever ninja this is".

With his hands in the air, tears in his eyes, laughing uncontrollably-

he says "GOTCHA!" 

His touch, 

finally rubbed me the wrong way.

...oh not so funny. 

His touch, nearly got him assaulted.

I was relieved that it was his touch, still irked. 

Once he pulled me to him (still laughing), his touch made me smile.

His touch, his warmth made me feel safe again. 

He plays too much!

His touch. His touch. His touch.

#HisTouchMakesMeCrazy

#30Layers30Days

Closer to Better

Gradually coming closer to peace,
     as the silent whispers cease.

Quietly getting better,
     she's let you in, unlike the day you met her.

The closer you get, the better she is,
     though constantly giving herself a quiz...

Follow the head or the heart?
     Can't decide the weaker part.
Her brain decides so she builds walls,
     You climb in, hoping they'd fall.

Dagnabit! This is scary, much like the Virgin Mary -
     It had to be - unable to see - what the outcome would be
          Jesus be a fence, not a hindrance
               Stop this girl's kicking, time is ah ticking.
   
So many emotions, you make her feel,
     the best is helping her heal.

Her heart is at risk, trying to maintain this -
     This love, this life isn't free of strife.
Loathing vulnerability,  loving security,
     she continues to trust, displaying her maturity.  
 
Through it all, she knows
   the closer, the better.
     even when you upset her.

She shows signs of that girl of old,
     It's the lioness in her, she remains bold.
Continue to keep her in your prayers,
     You've melted away the toughest layers.

You're closer to better more-so now than ever.
     A strong bond that will not sever.
   

#TheCloserTheBetter

#30Layers30Days

     


   

Can You See It Now???

"For the vision is yet for an appointed time, but at the end it shall speak, and not lie: though it tarry, wait for it; because it will surely come, it will not tarry."

~Habakkuk 2:3

Are you waiting for His promise to manifest? 

I am quite sure the answer is 'YES'. 

Is what you say different than what you whisper?

Hmmm...

I say 'yes' to His will...

I whisper 'I'm weary Lord'.

I say 'God's timing is perfect'...

I whisper 'eventually my time will come, I guess'.

I say 'my breakthrough'...

I whisper 'I'm not good enough'.

There, I admitted it...I have days where I think, say, feel the wrong things.

Sometimes, what you believe cannot be seen. 

Get tunnel vision. Walk and wait. Speak it. Work for it.

The vision you're chasing is waiting for you to catch it.

Will the waiting be worth the walk?

Only one way to find out -

#SilenceTheWhispers

#30Layers30Days

Going to 'NO'vember

Guard thy heart with all diligence, for out of it flows the issues of life. Proverbs 4:23

Welcome November. 

October has been the single-most difficult month for me - mind, body, and spirit. 

My patience has been tried, my faith tested, and my heart torn apart. The trials and tests came rapid fire from every aspect of my life.

I spent much of the month in tears, bitter, and afraid. 

Unwilling to write, unashamed of who I was, yet unable to climb out of that place.

I missed so much...

I missed giving opportunities. I missed leadership moments. 

I missed days of praying with my circle. I missed God a few times.

I missed events of close friends and family.

I failed to guard my heart, life's issues got the best of me.

I SHUT DOWN!

I began to build walls...again.

The best thing about it all, the Holy Spirit made concessions on my behalf.

The prayer circle kept praying and encouraging one another. 

Random friends would call and pray for me.

My children would pray and love on me. Hubby kept worshipping, letting me be.

God spoke to me repeatedly.

I could see the messages, but could barely hear them.

I knew it was God, but couldn't receive and believe.

Then I witnessed a miracle. I watched a 5 year old girl, with serious illnesses, be healed.

God healing her is a miraculous blessing, in itself. To witness her strength, courage, and heart was my miracle. She did not complain. She is an inspiration and lesson to me. 

November is my new year. 

NOvember Resolutions:

NO wall building

NO pity party

NO negative talk

NO doubt

NO assumptions

NO quitting

NO losing

NO complaining

NO guilt

The walls are coming down.

#ByeOctober